Think Your Girlfriend is Pregnant?

Your girlfriend may have said, "My period is late and I'm scared that I might be pregnant!" Those can be upsetting words. Lots of couples experience an unexpected pregnancy and immediately worry about how this will affect their future. Abortion seems like an easy and legal solution, but it does have significant risks that you may not understand. Having a baby doesn't mean the end of your dreams.

After the shock wears off, you may begin thinking about what you should do. What are your alternatives and responsibilities as a boyfriend and prospective father? You definitely have some things to think about.

Most women in an unplanned pregnancy want their boyfriend to help them decide what to do. Assure her that you will stand beside her in whatever way she needs through this. Tell her that you want to help her in making any choices that will affect your future.

The first thing you need to do is find out if she is really pregnant and learn about your options. To help her understand your support, go with her for the pregnancy test. She has more to lose in this pregnancy than you do because it will affect her physically. We provide confidential and free pregnancy tests along with many support services.

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Options to Consider

Parenting:

Taking responsibility for your actions and providing support for your child is a noble and commendable action. We offer free educational classes to help prepare you to be the best father possible. These classes include prenatal and infant care education, childbirth classes for moms and dads, community referrals, etc. As you participate in these classes you can earn diapers, baby clothes and furniture for your child. You won’t be alone in supporting her in this pregnancy.

Marry and raise the child together

The most loving act that you can do for your child is to commit to his/her mother. Commitment to each other, wanting to be a family and working together is the best option in these circumstances. Every child has the right to have both a father and mother in the home. If your child could choose to have their father there, they would choose you.

Adoption

Adoption is a loving, unselfish choice. Depending on the circumstances involved, this difficult decision may be the best one for your baby. Perhaps your girlfriend may decide that this option is one she wants for the baby and you feel like your baby is being abandoned. Think again. Adoption is making a plan for you child that will give him/her the future you may not be able to provide.

Adoption agencies and attorneys thoroughly screen families. Adoption has changed for the good. You can help choose the family that will raise your child. Open adoption allows you to have communication and pictures of your child. If you want, you can register with the state so that your child can find you when he/she turns 18. What would you say to your child when he/she finds you? You have 18 years to think about this, but you might begin with, “Your mother and I loved you and chose to give you a chance at a wonderful life.”

Abandon the woman

You could abandon your girlfriend, though this is not an honorable decision. You may feel that you have an education to think about. Maybe you want to see the world. Will you feel proud of this decision in five years, maybe ten years down the road?

Our actions have consequences and responsibilities. Have you ever felt abandoned during a difficult time in your life? Your girlfriend and your baby need you now. Whether you want this baby or not, you are still his/her father. Maybe your father was not available for you. You can break this pattern of abandonment with this relationship.

Abortion

This option carries traumatic consequences, not only for the baby, but also for your girlfriend and you. This may seem to be an option that hides the fact that your girlfriend is pregnant. You may think that the “problem is gone.” However, evidence-based research has shown that many men and women suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. They are filled with guilt and shame, regretting the choice they made. This child is a life. It is not an extension of your girlfriend’s body. If you care about your girlfriend and the baby she may be carrying you will want to protect them. You need to know what the risks of abortion are [Learn about Procedure Types]

Society will tell you that this life is just a piece of tissue and this “simple procedure” will eliminate all your trouble. Think again.

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